Once you know what you can be, you know what you can do...
It was suggested to me recently that I should write. more. particularly as a way of recognizing the interconnectedness of things from and within an expanded view of experiencing.
As this year draws to a close and the next year is being ushered into existence, it is a natural time of reflection and future-visioning. And the present has its own uniqueness, with the threads of time interwoven into the fabric of the being-ness and doing-ness web of life.
A few hours from now there is also a practice being held in honor of someone I knew who died three days ago. She was one of the most gentle and kind people I have ever met.
Looking at the brief text thread with Marcy, from the last one I sent while she was in the ICU saying that I was envisioning her surrounded in a blanket of love to our initial texting connection on Dec 29 2019 after she and I shared an experience of viewing one of the year-of-deepening-in-compassion Dharma talks (we were the only 2 that day and ended up huddled up around the center's iPad in comfy chairs upstairs... a very sweet memory), to her sharing about the tattoo she had gotten in March, I recalled how even though our time in friendship was brief, I felt connected with her on a deep level and appreciated her inner strength and resilience as well as her sense of adventure and lighthearted humor.
We talked about traveling to Thailand together and I felt honored that she considered me a potential travel companion (the feeling was mutual; she was very easy to imagine exploring with and managing good self care). We never did get together for that tea we talked about meeting for... it's an image that makes me smile that somewhere down the trail we just might find ourselves sipping tea in Thailand together...
She had a dog named Risa who was (almost) always with her. The Sukhavati ceremony is performed for the benefit of helping the deceased transition through the Bardo by lessening suffering, fear and loss and offering focus and clarity. May we do this with the same spirit as the emotionally calming angel Risa did for her in this life _/|\_
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"Enough is enough and more is too much" ~something I once heard an adult say to a child when I was a teenager. It stuck with me.
One of the aspects of Adult-ing is that we are the ones who need to determine our own enough-ness.
I paused at this juncture of my writing and contemplated this on my walk. Meandering through thoughts, moving and embodying this concept brought me to wondering whether "too-much-ness" applied only to what we label so-called "bad" behaviors/emotions/events, etc. and by the time I returned home I concluded that: There IS such a thing as too much of anything, but it's more about counterbalancing. (I have my tai chi teacher to thank for deepening my understanding of balance, which I believe is one of the keys to harmony and healing).
Too much doing without enough being or too much being without enough doing both can bring imbalances. Yin ☯ Yang
Too much gentleness without enough strength can lead to a lack of healthy boundaries; and when gentleness is counterbalanced with strength it can provide a necessary framework, as in a tender heart supported by a strong spine. Strength is not inherently harmful, however, when viewed as a tool, we all know that tools can be misused.
A further metaphor could be how part of the strength of the body's assimilation of nutrients from food depends on how well the semipermeable membrane of the small intestine allows the beneficial particles to be absorbed, as determined by how resilient the cellular junctions are after being widened.
Not too tight; not too loose.
The give and take of these examples resembles a dance of:
receiving and leading
feminine and masculine
being and doing
And ultimately...
When a spider knows she is a spider she builds a web.
(Once you know what you can be, you know what you can do)
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