outer space

This is a photo

of what

isn't

there...

Picture an 8-foot tall by 10-foot long horse trailer here.

Just sitting there, seldom used, in case of an emergency.

I never thought anything of it, it was just there.

Someone decided to put it there.

I never thought about what it was blocking.

I never thought about the effect it had on me.

Until it was gone.

By chance, it needed to be moved temporarily recently.

The barn is just behind, so it is a place I spend a good part of my day.

I found myself feeling better in this space.

I could breathe better, I literally felt as if a weight had been lifted.

I am working to find a new home for it.

Made me wonder what other 'trailers' might be ready to be moved.

...that's how the light gets in

One year ago today, my love and I got to see Leonard Cohen at the Confederation Center in Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, Canada. A great story in and of itself how he managed to get us tickets... I don't go to a lot of concerts anymore because I've gotten very selective, but this experience blew my mind.....

It's also been about one year of some intense participation in the 'healing game' for me. For many years now I have been on a path of becoming friends (or at least friendly) with my body, which has led me to some fascinating places. But it all started with a curiosity about whether my relationship with my body was creating some sort of disconnect in my approach to my life overall. I've placed much importance on understanding the connection and inter-connectedness of body, spirit, and creativity, and have understood on an intellectual level how they all have an effect on each other, but my awareness has been increased when I began considering all of this along with the idea that...

Energy Follows Thought

And it's not always conscious thought, in fact, I believe it's often unconscious thought, or what we learn as children (whether intentionally taught or unintentionally learned, this is not a parent-bashing session). Bringing one's thoughts to consciousness can be a difficult process, because let's face it, our thoughts, wherever they come from, are not all of sunshine and roses. But then I started recognizing that I am not those thoughts, unless I choose to identify with them. I am speaking of the types of thoughts based in self-doubt and self-judgment, anything blocking my creative expression of who I am. So why go through it?? I have asked myself that many times, and at one point I realized it was simply to be able to be present with joy. By following and identifying with thoughts of authenticity rather than the other stuff.

You are not responsible for your disease

but you are responsible to the disease

When a progressive chiropractor/nutritionist/intuitive healing-type person I consult with said this to me, it brought me out of the darkness I was in at the time, trying to figure out what I had done 'wrong' to create this dis-ease in my second chakra (dwelling place of the self). Then on the journey of handling it, I encountered this statement...

What is not life threatening... is life OFFERING

And,

Look back only long enough to see how far you've come

We all have power statements, touchstones, things that we connect to that help us make sense of what life brings and to find some inner peace. What are yours?


Indeed, there is a crack in everything...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgYlqKxV54Q&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIFDXHw0eaY&feature=related

brainTEAser

Expansion On Tea

"There is a vitali-tea, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.  And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost.  The world will not have it.  It is not our business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions.  It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.  You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work.  You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.  Keep the channel open..."  Martha Graham (1894-1991)

 

Authentici-tea, Availabili-tea

(really, not much more to say after these two...)

Brevi-tea

(speak your truth with simplici-tea and compassion)

Clari-tea, Creativi-tea, Chari-tea

(when there is true expression of the divine within, one's cup runneth over)

Divini-tea.....

Elastici-tea; Emp-tea-ness

(love the stretchy jeans) (target: the mind)

Fragili-tea, Flexibili-tea

(plans are great things if you're prepared for them not to work out)

Gravi-tea, generosi-tea

(stay grounded, then you are in a position to give of yourself freely from that centered place inside)

Hones-tea

(On the bottle of citrus spice decaf tea:  'Barry rides a unicycle, so he's got some balance.

Just don't look at his desk.'  I cannot ride a unicycle, but I too loves my piles)

Interconnectivi-tea, Ingenui-tea

(relate to life around you, do not isolate; sometimes we have to be clever to find some common ground,

but consider believing that it is there and being patient until it shows itself)

J

Kara-tea

(be a warrior when it comes to taking care of yourself, but do not intentionally harm others)

Longevi-tea, Levi-tea

(to feel as good as you can for as long as you can, strive to gain altitude in the attitude)

Mana-tea

(oh so sweet, gentle cows of the sea)

N

Opportuni-tea, Originali-tea

(create authentic opportunities by being who you are, where you want to be, and then

paying attention to what the universe presents especially for you)

Plen-tea

(you are enough; you have enough; you do enough)

Quali-tea

(do the best you can with what you have and with what you know)

Royal-tea

(Lady Di... need I say more?)

Serendipi-tea, Synchronici-tea, Sensitivi-tea, Sani-tea, Sereni-tea

(the spice of life with a side of reali-tea and peace)

Tranquili-tea

(spend some time each day in silence)

Unbreakabili-tea

(inner strength and outer strength manifest in very different ways; tears are actually a sign of a

great depth of feeling and emotion, not weakness)

Vulnerabili-tea

(the depth to which one allows oneself to experience pain is in direct proportion to which one may experience joy)

W

X

Y

Z

Can anyone come up with more, or fill in any of the blanks?

Synchronicity

There is great clarity and a sense of completion in finding oneself having come full circle with an experience, but even more delightful to discover that the circle keeps going.  The circle becomes like an artichoke with more rich layers underneath... and the layers keep going around and around... until you reach the tender heart.  Which of course is protected by a bristly choke.

I recently had this full circle'ish experience when I reconnected with a boss from a place I left 6 years ago.  I was thrilled he took the time out of his day to have lunch with me.  And during lunch he said that he was so honored that I remembered him and my previous job place enough to revisit and reconnect, because, you know, 'we didn't end on the best of terms'.  I was shocked and had no idea what he was talking about!  There was a wave of horror/embarrassment/shame that came over me as I franticly tried to remember how things ended, sure that I was the one who offended him somehow, that I didn't even hear the rest of what he said '... and I always felt badly about that'.

He was surprised that I had no recollection of the event, and I could see he wished he hadn't brought it up.  Even when he explained more fully what the event was, I still had only a vague memory.  Turns out he had promised me something, some time off that I had requested, and then due to another staff person having an emergency, he needed to take it back.  Apparently I was so upset, I even wrote him a note, which essentially was a resignation letter, stating among other reasons that I was leaving and that this incident was a last straw.  (I told him I hope he burned the note, God knows what I said!)  He did say that he had a sense that I was ready to move on from the job anyways, yet he has felt badly for this many years.  He was right, it was time for me to move on, and I only have fond memories of my experience working there.

One never knows... I hadn't even been planning to reconnect, yet a series of synchronistic events led me there, and 'suddenly' we were having lunch together.  A first, actually.

I am grateful to have had the opportunity to clear the air, and I thanked him for bringing it up.  Reminded me of how sensitive we all are, and how usually the most sensitive and heart-protective ones among us have learned or needed to put up the toughest exterior.

It also left me wondering how many of these life events and interactions with one another we hang onto, for whatever reason, that we really can just allow ourselves to let go of...  the other person has long since forgotten... 

I do believe that in reality, it is a rare occurrence that we get to bring these experiences to a place of forgiveness, resolution, and completion face-to-face.  Had my boss, who I now consider a friend, not had the courage to bring this up, we wouldn't have had the opportunity to move forward in a fresh new way.  Miguel Ruiz says, 'don't take anything personally, what another person does is because of them, not because of you'.  In this situation this was very true, whatever hurt or upset I had over the time off incident I apparently let go of shortly thereafter (maybe even as soon as I wrote him the letter).  It was also a reminder to be mindful of how we can affect others with our words and our actions.

And to flow with life, to be willing to experience coincidences along the way,

to be open to healing opportunities for ourselves and others,

and to allow intuition and insight to lead to the meaning in them for ourselves.

I for one whole(artichoke)heartily believe in synchronicity.